1. The first meal after you give birth tastes like it was prepared by an angel and floated down on a cloud. For me: graham crackers and apple juice.
2. It gets easier. Then harder. Then easier. Then harder.
3. You will buy beautiful artisanal baby toys but the baby would trade them all for an iphone of her very own.
4. “Date nights” are essential to feel like a couple and not just a couple of baby slaves.
5. When going out with a baby, bring twice as many diapers, milk bottles, and snacks and you think you will need.
6. If there is any danger in the room—an outlet, a sharp corner, the baby will go there.
7. You will never feel so vulnerable, so in love, so part of life.
8. Keep paper plates in your home. Tell yourself they are for “tough days” but use them whenever.
9. Make a big batch of food on Sunday to make Monday easier for everyone.
10. When you fail at #9 (and you will) you will subsist on bites of cheese and baby biscuits and feel terrible.
11. It’s OK to leave the baby with my husband to get some time to myself. Even if it’s just coffee and 20 pages of a book.
12. You will feel like you are spending all your money at Target.
13. Seeing how wonderful a father my husband is made me fall in love with him in a whole new way.
14. You will have a 3AM argument about which one of you is more tired.
15. I don’t get annoyed when I hear a baby crying in public anymore, only sympathy.
16. It is OK to accept help. Help others too.
17. Babies teach us patience.
18. Some days you will envision what life would be like had you never had a baby, like my alternate life in which I join a Tuscan monastery.
19. Some moments will be so wonderful you will think, “I am living my life’s purpose right now.”
20. Babies grow and soon they aren’t really babies anymore, so make as many memories as your heart can hold.

Happy Birthday Julia!